Pawning the Family Jewels
May 20, 2009 – 1:58 amI am so sad, as I read about Le Mother Country descending to the ranks of places like America, Canada and heaven forbid, New Zealand. All of those culture-less savages live for today and have no respect for the future. They are the epitome of what is wrong with the third world: They have no industry left and just spend spend spend.
Not like France, we have industry: Le Vin! Le Foie Gras, Louis Vuitton and Hermes. Le Parfumers. We are the capital of all that is fine on this earth. But our government has been bailing our Le Fat Chats, and there is no money left to support our ridiculous, bloated, arcane, insular, confiscatory fabulous welfare statist social programs. Now there is no le dole money left so all my brethren in Paris and Cannes must now sell Le Petrus and Le Lafite and Le Mouton in order to pay the rent.
It is a sad day for France, it is a sad day for moi. But rest assured that as I single handedly save the French wine business, I pledge that we will soon have a chicken in every pot and a bottle of Romanee Conti on every table. Please, please, join me in saving Le Mother Country.